- I am not a real redhead.
- I am a natural blonde.
- If you make some blonde joke in my company, I will laugh.. because I am not a blonde, I’m a redhead.
- I wish on stars.
- Sometimes, it works.
- The place that pays my bills is an industry I don’t necessarily believe in.
- I wonder if I’ve sold out because of this.
- When I was five, I wanted to grow up and be a cartoon character. (Riff Raff’s girlfriend, Cleo, from the Heathcliff cartoons, if you must know.)
- When I was 16, I wanted to grow up and be the first female president of the United States.
- When I was 21, I wanted to have my own syndicated morning radio show.
- (I still do.)
- I don’t like my food to touch. Unless it’s breakfast. A good southern breakfast is meant to be combined.
- I don’t like to eat the last of anything. I’m the biatch who puts a swallow of OJ back in the fridge and who leaves one Oreo left in the package. This makes me feel skinnier, to never “finish anything off”.
- There is not a food I don’t like.
- (Except carrots. I HATE carrots.)
- I used to think I was bad with money, but as I’ve gotten older, I realized I was smarter than I gave myself credit for.
- I hate puns.
- I had most of the original season of SNL memorized by the time I was 10.
- Gilda Radner has been, and always will be, my idol.
- I don’t think Will Ferrell is funny.
- I watch The Princess Bride for the swordfighting.
- And Mandy Patinkin.
- I feel most at peace when I’m outside, no matter the weather.
- I’d rather have a small piece of really good chocolate than a huge bowl of mediocre ice cream.
- If I go to the movie theatre, I have to have a cherry coke.
- I don’t believe in dry cleaning. I swear by Dryel.
- My husband and I firmly believe in living within our means.
- Which, sometimes, we actually do.
- I sang backup for Sesame Street’s Bob McGrath.
- He swears like a sailor, in case you were wondering.
- Don’t even get me started on his rendition of “Rubber Ducky”.
- I hate smiling in pictures with my mouth open.
- I am italian. This affects me in many ways I’m proud of, but also some that plague me.
- I am never happy with my hair. I constantly change it.
- I drink a LOT of water.
- I live in a historic neighborhood that was built for local mill workers at the turn of the (last) century. I lurve it.
- I make up my own words.
- All of our pets (4: 2 dogs, 2 cats) are rescued.
- One cat and one dog (both female, oddly enough) are deaf.
- A suitor once wrote a song for me titled “Queen of the Universe”. I still have it, somewhere.
- I commute a long way to work. I wish I didn’t have to.
- I was anti-snuggling before I met my husband.
- I HATE cookie cakes.
- I buy most of my clothes on eBay.
- My favorite holidays are Halloween and Christmas, because they have the most festive food.
- Puppets are the easiest way to amuse me.
- Or just an inanimate object that you lend a voice to.
- The Muppets owned me.
- I love pink.
- But not the Victoria’s Secret brand of teen-wear.
- My professional life revolves around acronymns.
- This sucks when you’re a fan of actual words and language.
- Dr. Seuss shaped me into the person I am today.
- My two favorites are The Sneetches and The Lorax.
- I am horrible at math.
- I can smell testosterone.
- That is not always a good thing. Nor is it always a bad thing.
- I can’t swallow pills. I don’t care how small they are or what tricks you provide me with, I just can’t.
- Of all scents ever, I prefer to smell like honey.
- I cannot burp. It’s something I’m physically incapable of. (edit: Until I got pregnant.)
- People with obnoxious laughs bother me. It’s not the actual laugh that I find obnoxious, but the fact that they’re laughing at something that is really stupid.
- Jack Handy is a freakin’ genius.
- Growing up, “shut up” and “liar” were bad words in our house. I still have trouble using either phrase.
- I am a devil’s advocate by nature.
- I have gotten most places in life by utilizing my feminine wiles.
- I’ve been successful once I got there by utilizing my brain.
- I firmly believe in karma. Mostly because I’ve watched it work.
- I’m a big “pay it forward” person.
- I am HORRIBLE at gift giving.
- I have to have 8-9 hours of sleep daily to be a useful individual. Anything less than 6 hours will cause me to crash. HARD.
- My hands are allergic to water.
- Seriously.
- I will rub my feet together to self-soothe and fall asleep. This drives my husband nuts.
- I always tend to side with the villains in stories.
- They’re far more interesting.
- Before I got pregnant, I spent about five months of the year involved onstage. The other seven months were backstage.
- A cup of earl grey with local honey and milk can cure any ailment.
- My grandmother used to take me for picnics in a local cemetary, to teach me that we never were to fear death.
- I still visit cemetaries today for peace and solace.
- I don’t fear death.
- I believe that you shouldn’t worry about the size of your clothes, but instead focus on the quality and cut of them.
- I am not a beer drinker.
- I prefer wine. I lurve wine, actually.
- I know a lot of American Sign Language.
- Unfortunately, it’s all completely inappropriate.
- Come to think of it, I know a lot of bad words in several languages.
- I’m very cultured.
- I have two tattoos. They both feature butterflies.
- I want another one someday.
- I can tell if a person is unstable by their eyes.
- I love sweaters. They are my favorite piece of clothing.
- My husband bought me porn for my birthday. Because that’s what I asked for.
- I prefer cream sauce over red sauce.
- I would eat fruit instead of chocolate anyday.
- Unfortunately, none of our vending machines around here stock fruit.
- I am OCD about a lot of things.
- Cleaning is a big one. My house is cleaned twice a week.
- Spelling is another one.
- Lists are a particular OCD thing for me. They have to end on an odd number to be aesthetically pleasing to the eye.
100 Things about Sarah Lena
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